by

Reb Bradley

For many home school moms FRUSTRATION characterizes their days, and as STRESS grows, so does their ANGER. For these moms, their homes are not a place of peace, but rather a source of confused emotions: they feel GUILTY for their angry outbursts, FEARFUL for what they are doing to their children, and DISCOURAGED because they feel so helpless. This workshop looks at various causes of anger and offers reliable biblical solutions.

I. WHY DON'T WE WANT ANGER IN OUR HOMES?

A. Eph 4:31; Col 3:8; Jam 1:19 It God

Eph 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

Col 3:8 But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.

James 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,

B. Prov 15:18; 29:22; 30:33; Jam 4:1 It bears

Proverbs 15:18 A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel.

Proverbs 29:22 An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins.

James 4:1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?

II. WHAT IS RIGHTEOUS ANGER?

A. Mk 3:5; 10:14; Mt 21:12

Mark 3:5 He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts, said to the man, "Stretch out your hand." He stretched it out, and his hand was completely restored.

Mark 10:14 When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.

Matthew 21:12 Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves.

B. Prov 29:8,11; 14:17

Proverbs 29:8 Mockers stir up a city, but wise men turn away anger… 11 A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

Proverbs 14:17 A quick-tempered man does foolish things, and a crafty man is hated.

III. OUTWARD CAUSES OF AGGRAVATION

A. kids -- disobedience -- willful - out of control -- wild -- unruly -- untrained

SOLUTION: They can be

Prov 29:15 The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.

Prov 29:17 Discipline your son, and he will give you peace; he will bring delight to your soul. (See Prov 23:24-25; 10:1; 17:21)

B. children -- whining, complaining, bickering

SOLUTION: A child who knows his boundaries is a child

Deut 5:16 "Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the LORD your God is giving you.

Prov 3:1 My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, 2 for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity.

C. expectations

with normal kids

With Special needs kids

They are expensive -- they break, spill, tear, stain

SOLUTION: Accept them -- pray for -- love is

1 John 3:16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.

John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

D. " " children

thwarted goals -- unfulfilled expectations

parent thinks they have something better to do -- misunderstand their purpose

SOLUTION: Welcome children as for God's kingdom a parent has nothing better to do than train up children

Psalms 127:3-5 Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him. {4} Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. {5} Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate.

Deut 6:6-9 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. {7} Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. {8} Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. {9} Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Eph 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

1 Tim 3:4-5 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. {5} (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church?)

IV. ROOT CAUSES OF ANGER (Which determine the intensity and frequency of response) :

A. --

SOLUTION: See a for a

B. stress -- out of control

SOLUTION:

1. Phil 4:4-8 Learn the art of

2. Submit yourself to a

C. Desire for

SOLUTION:

1. Luke 22:42 Entrust the of each day to Christ

Luke 22:42 "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done."

2. 1 Tim 6:6; Mat 6:25-33 Crave more than accomplishment

1 Tim 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.

Mat 6:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? . . . 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

3. Jam 1:20; Ps 20:7; Prov 28:26 Trust that God will honor a

James 1:20 for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

Psa 20:7 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.

Prov 28:26 He who trusts in himself is a fool . . .

D. /

SOLUTION:

1. Job 1:21-22; Rom 8:28 Trust in God's -- offenders are

Job 1:21-22 and said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." {22} In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

2. Eph 4:32; Col 3:13 as God has you

Ephesians 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Colossians 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

a. Rom5:10; Gen6:5; Job 25:4-6 Remember the great God you

Romans 5:10 For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!

Genesis 6:5 The LORD saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time.

Job 25:4-6 How then can a man be righteous before God? How can one born of woman be pure? {5} If even the moon is not bright and the stars are not pure in his eyes, {6} how much less man, who is but a maggot-- a son of man, who is only a worm!"

b. John 13:34; Luke 19:8 Allow that fresh dose of spill over

John 13:34 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

Luke 19:8 But Zacchaeus stood up and said to the Lord, "Look, Lord! Here and now I give half of my possessions to the poor, and if I have cheated anybody out of anything, I will pay back four times the amount."

3. Eph 5:1-2, 25 Set your sights on not tolerance

Ephesians 5:1-2 Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children {2} and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

E. /

SOLUTION:

1. Eph 4:29; Col 2:18,23; 2 Tim 3:2 Confess & repent of as pride

Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

Col 2:18 Do not let anyone who delights in false humility and the worship of angels disqualify you for the prize. Such a person goes into great detail about what he has seen, and his unspiritual mind puffs him up with idle notions.… 23 Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.

2 Timothy 3:2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,

2. Mat 16:24; Col 3:5 yourself

Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

Colossians 3:5 Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.

3. Job 42:5; Is 6:5; Heb 12:1-3 Live to "see"

Job 42:5 My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you.

Isaiah 6:5 "Woe to me!" I cried. "I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD lmighty."

Hebrews 12:1-3 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. {2} Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. {3} Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

F. - love

1. looking for identity in

2. Fear of

3. Fear of

SOLUTION:

a. Prov 29:25; Mat 10:28; Rom 8:31 Find security in God's

Proverbs 29:25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.

Matthew 10:28 Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

Romans 8:31 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?

b. Rom 12:5; stop looking to them for

2 Cor 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

c. 1 Cor 13:5; Eph 5:25 be a not a

1 Corinthians 13:5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her